I know I said that I wouldn’t vent but I need someone to talk to about my problems My suicidal thoughts, my depression, my insomnia, my slight ptsd, every problem that I have

Ask me what’s wrong I don’t know, I don’t know shit I just want the unbearable pain of living to just go the **** away. I want to love, and to be loved, I want to know if I can have a future in this miserable place, if I’ll have a future with someone, I want to know if everything will get better, but tell me that it will, and it won’t, tell me everything will be okay, and it isn’t. People ignore me like I’m a nobody, here and not on here. I’m just invisible, I’m a ****ing piece of trash, floating in a sea of hate, alone, scared, annoyed, feeling small and like I’m just nothing important. I’m only here to pick up the mess that I’ve made. I should’ve been gone already, I should’ve been better, because then, maybe everything WOULD be better. It’s still the same old ****ing world, and I’m still the same old ****ing me. They say people can change, and I would’ve hoped to change, I would’ve hoped to live a better life, and maybe NOT think about running away from my home, and from everyone I know.