but it’s okay. im gonna lock in. it’s gonna be Fine. not my First Rodeo guys its just this rodeo broke both my legs and actually all my Limbs and i am just a homunculus slab of meat and squirming organs.

my worst enemy right now is Probably myself so that’s like. Good-ish news. but why am i so Mean to myself why does my Head say that everyone’s gonna kill me and why do i BELIEVE IT! STOP BELIEVING IT! oh my Gad!

my junior year delressive episode lasted like. um. actually only Five months. this one may last a whole year!

maybe im making it up i was doing better back when i was At school and around people. maybe i feel like shit because i’m usually so alone during school breaks. but i am still really emotionally volatile and flipping out at like Everything. and when i’m by myself i notice these Things More

but good News i haven’t cried myself to sleep in a Week… yay! i’m still crying a good Amount but im trying to put an end to the Sobbing my poor eyeballs out because the next day i’ll be like Wow i crg so mych my life is horrible. and if i cry less i’ll be like. wow i haven’t cried in a while i am so Great and Awesome