i can already feel him distancing and it hurts, not as much as before but still..

but if i moved with him i wouldnt be able to finish school or get my medical liscence

everything i worked for would be for nothing...

we'd be single income, because i wouldnt be able to get job because id have no highschool diploma, i wouldnt get my cna,,, which ive waited so long for, i wouldnt get to see ivy grow up, I wouldntget to see my friends, id be completely alone except for him, i dont even know the language...

and if we do split id be stuck in a country without anyone this is gen a big commitment, obviously im going to go through with it, it's just that cons outway the pros in my favour

plus this whole emancipation thing makes me feel so guilty and so sick to my stomach idk if i want to go through with it but i know i have to

i just ranaway from home and you want me to move my whole life around again????? I understand im just frustrated urrrghhhhhh

the feminist in me is boiling bc it says if im to marry a military personel id have to be stay at home and like cool im fine with that but also RAHHHHHH IM NOT A TRADWIFE :(

but also hes the love of my life so im going to stick this out i think this just is a big commitment and im ready for it im just hesistant

and also kids? on a single income household? that's not exactly the best scenario...

those kids wouldnt even have family outside of us.. seeing as id have to get emancipated. we'd be in a different country, plus idk abt the laws, I dont think id be able to change my name

plus gay marriage isnt legalized yet

I know hes just going to be in an entire different country

and like he's going to meet no and cooler people and live the life HE WASNTS and im going to be alone alone, no little dates no hangouts, no one to talk to at school you'd be gone and him and you gguys are all i really have

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