I doubt really anyone would ever see this, but it just helps to type and get things off of my chest. Idk if that makes sense to anyone, but it's just how I simply cope when I have something I feel I need to say. To put it simply Flipanim has kind of ruined and destroyed not only my self-esteem, but my mental health as a whole. I'm not going to sit here and blame anyone though, I'm just going to say that I'm dealing with some things and so I may take a lot of breaks that might be one piece of art per week, or month. I've just completely lost motivation to even be an artist. Art makes me happy, but it's hard to be here and be happy.

I just feel like this place has a lot of turmoil, sadness, and angriness here. It's hard to find a spot where I belong here. I wouldn't ever call myself popular, despite maybe some thinking so. I hardly get any likes anymore. But thats also apart of the allegations from a bit ago, but also because I just hardly post. But I also just don't enjoy what I do as much as I did when I was learning as a young and new creator on this site. It's hard to entertain and give thoughtful and complete pieces when you're dealing with stress and a part of you feeling like you're missing. I don't ask anyone to be sorry for me, this is just how it is. I'm just probably not in the best place to be posting anyways. I wanted to try and come back here because I did start here. This was the place where I found myself growing faster and building unlikely friendships. I appreciate all of the connections I have gotten to have with a lot of you. While some friendships maybe never went well, or ended up in disaster, I still appreciate

those people and the company and advice that was given to me by them. I don't "hate" anyone. Hate is a strong word. But I am disappointed in peoples actions. Just like my own. I was never really the best person back then, but I'm confident to say I have grown and matured. I hope others see that too. I've been trying really hard to get back on my feet and understand from different views rather than black and white. I've also been trying hard to be more friendly rather than filled with hate. And I understand if maybe you don't like me or appreciate me, that's your decision to make. Not mine. But I have been focusing on me, and how to work on myself. Although not in the best mental place, I'm growing as a person. I hope that's good enough for people. And if it isn't, I'll work even harder. But yeah, I'm not sure how much I'll be posting. I haven't really slept very well in a while. And very up and down feelings.

No, this isn't a ploy for likes or to get anyone to say "oh im so sorry you have to go through that". This is the part everyone goes through, and I know I'm not alone. I know that others deal with this and sometimes maybe even worse than me. I don't want this post to get likes, just to be seen. Why do I want it to be seen? Because I want to be more open and honest and forthcoming. I hope people understand. I know lots of people have turned their backs on me because of my actions. I apologize to all of those people who have had to deal with me. And yes I was a kid, and I still am, but thats no excuse. I did wrong and bad things, but believe me when I say I wish I could take it all back. And truthfully, I wish I never came to this site. But a part of me is still glad I did. To learn, grow, and experience change.

I appreciate the kind encouraging words :)