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Snippet from my story.
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21.09.2019
15 comments
21.09.2019 22:23
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So this might take awhile since I wrote this on paper.
21.09.2019 22:33
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Small specks of dew blew in the fresh spring air. Winter had just ended and patches of snow remained, slowly melting from the sun's rays. Grasshoppers hopped while butterflies fluttered as kits and pups whined to their mothers. Clover sat up in the leaf pile she had taken refuge in, already wet from the morning breeze. She looked around and stretched, thinking about what she might hunt today. Clover was a brown wolf with white and grey markings. Her eyes were as green as the treetops. Clover lived in the forest next to the mountains. Other animals had roamed there, stalking from the trees to the forest floor. There was no such thing as "allies", you could never trust anyone. Clover started walking into the field, anxious to make her kill. She sniffed the air, picking up the scent of a rabbit. She stalked close to the ground and pounced. She shut her eyes as she hated the sight of the small creature dying. She let her teeth sink into it's throat and opened her eyes. There lie a rosey red fox.
21.09.2019 22:36
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She gasped and jumped off of it. "Oh my gosh!" Clover beckoned as she saw hot red blood oozing out of his neck. "Raskal! What happened? She saw several figures coming closer to her. Before Clover knew it, she had passed out.
21.09.2019 22:36
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Mkay I know I'm not the best at writing but that's the beginning of my story.
21.09.2019 22:43
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I also changed up some things to make it sound better-
21.09.2019 22:44
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Do you want me to post more of it?
21.09.2019 22:46
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Y E S
21.09.2019 22:41
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NO THIS IS AMA,ING BRO
21.09.2019 22:43
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Aw thank you ;)
21.09.2019 22:44
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One thing to think about. I wouldnt just, describe your character out of no where like that. It just seems very out of place. Instead, I would describe her while shes taking a drink from the stream. Ya know, talking about her reflection. So it's a more subtle, lol yeah, she looks like this.
21.09.2019 22:44
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Otherwise, it was really good!!
21.09.2019 22:48
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Yeah, I didn't really have time to think it out. I also wrote this at 4am so I was sleep deprived and didn't know how to do *anythingg*
21.09.2019 22:49
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I totally understand!!! And I'm sorry if I offended you, you seem a bit standoffish? I'm just trying to be helpful! :)
21.09.2019 23:09
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Aha sometimes I find myself standoffish. Uhm but yeah I find your information helpful. You didn't offend me though. Sorry if you felt I was standoffish, I wasn't trying to say it in that way. Yknow, it's easier to understand when saying it in person.
21.09.2019 23:13
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I only seem standoffish online though. Irl I'm more sarcastic and funny. (If you knew my family irl we make sarcastic jokes a lot) Maybe I try to sound sarcastic online but I fail? Idk.
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