(hugs)

When is it to beat yourself up

hhhh illusion it isnt all your fault

This isn't your fault. You clearly loved your friend, and you didn't wish them harm. I'm sure you are some of their fondest memories.

I love youuuu Illusion okay I care about you

I wish I— we could help... I know you're not ok, I know it's tough, horrible, scary.. Just please don't do anything you'll regret. I'm serious.

Take your time, no-one is rushing you to feel better... I'm still here and I'm not going anywhere... And i still believe, i believe i can help... I really do... But this is just Flipanim, not real life... I cant really help... I can try... Take pride in your small victories, because small victories lead to bigger ones. You got out of bed? Sometimes that deserves an inner self-five... You're not crazy or weak. You're a nice and strong person... We dont know eachother so much... But im really trying to help you... Some days you'll have setbacks, but just know that tomorrow is a new day with new possibilities. I care about you. I care about people. If you'd rather talk to someone professional and aren't already, I can help you sort that out. You're not wrong for feeling the way you do and no one blames you for it. Depression is natural. Everyone is allowed to have Depression... Even i had Depression one time... Even Autophobia... Just do the best you can because that's enough.

I'm so sorry to hear that and I wish there was something I could do to help you, but take as much time as you need to be sad and let it out. Even though his suffering is over, I'm sure he was very special to you and you have every right to be depressed. And remember, it's not your fault. If he was already having thoughts like that, then there wasn't much you could do for him. We all love you and understand if you don't wanna talk to anyone, just take your time to heal.