i cant help how i feel. its outside of my control. so im ****ing sorry i feel like nobody cares. i know they do and theyve tried their best to help me. i know that. i do. but my emotions arent something i can just ****ing change with the snap of my fingers. i wanna be able to talk about shit like this but i cant help but think people are gonna hate me for it or get mad at me for it so i just dont say anything. and even when i finally talk about my feelings, shit like this happens and i end up pissing people off and they just ****ing despise me over something i cant ****ING HELP!!!!!!! ITS SUCH A LOAD OF BULLSHIT!!!!