Of accidentally hurting ppl like loved ones

I’m aware of my family’s long line of mental problems,problems with anger and what not

I’ve seen it in myself at times and it makes me feel sick ,I feel angry that I’m angry and I don’t think I know how to feel any other way and that’s what scares me,bc what if one day I don’t catch myself and I go to far and I end up just like my parents

I know I may seem annoying and probably a loose wire but i just cant Figure out how to act any other way

I’m not lookin for answers I’m just practicing being emotionally clear