Ty

My sister always did stuff for me but then she started blaming me for everything

My cousin hates me my parents are going thru stress and once my mom said if i were ever depressed she would feel like a failure and that she didnt do a good enough job raising me

My cousin would hold me down on the floor then my sister would get the nerf gun and shoot me and those hurt and then they would find like glass and hurt me with it and if i leaved or told anyone they would say that i will regret saying it and hurt me even more

Thanks

Usually if i didnt wanna get shot by the gun then i would have to go do an embarrassing task for them like dancing or singing to them

I want to tell my mom but i dont want to her hate herself

They wont hurt me my mom will just hate herself forever

I-i cant bring myself to do it you dont know what my familys going thru its hard rn on us heck we barely are able to get things and my house is falling apart

Soon i have to live in an apartment

Its fine its fine u cant rly do anything for us rn bc of whats going on

(Not to make it sound rude)

Ok...

Theres too manythings to tell that my depression has built up so much to the point where thats all im hanging on to still if i had known this is what it was going to be like i wouldnt be on here i wouldnt know u rn or anything

I could of ended up wanting to be what i used to wanna be which is a teacher but bc of my depression and anxiety i changed my whole life

I still do what my sister says will give wishes i still have some wishes i wished for when i was like 7 that havent comed true

11...

Im surprised you arent like im too young to be depressed and stuff like that

Thats good

But like i said if i were too id feel like im using them and that there just someone i need to hold onto and end up dragging them down with me

I feel like i will end up doing that