le dance w/ randomperson ;-;
Untitled
Untitled
THE RILEYVERSE :: DR. FRUIT
Untitled
Something
TYSM for 3000 followers!! <3
another update
by:
Vally-kalma 
50
50
27.05.2024
3 comments
Vally-kalma[OP]
27.05.2024 06:43
LinkI did my CT scan the other day, had to drink two bottles of barium, basicly a liquid metal that helps the machine see ya guts. and then i got shot up with iodine, which was ****ing insane. it made my face and crotch so hot and light headed. it went away shortly after though. my stomach is still in extreme pain. i get my results tmmr im terffied to find out what else is wrong.
on top of that ive been losing more sight in my left eye again, which probally means im gaining more of my families health issues i was really praying didnt get hsared to me, like how my older sisters health is perfectly fine.
i havent been able to do much art like ive been wanting, and i was planning out for my streaming channel before any of this started so now i can continue that.
due to my stomach absultey ****ing tryin to kill me, i have lost 20lbs? 15? some where along those lines. im slightly greatful because i needed to lose weight as is to help out with my health. but this isnt somwthing to be proud of. i wish i could be prou
Vally-kalma[OP]
27.05.2024 06:47
Linkproud* that i was slimmer but i cant knowing im basicly dying.
other than the phsyical health my mental health isnt any better. my home life got really stressful recently. i wont get too much into details about that part <33 im still very stingey abt my personal life rn. but i dropped A lot of ppl i thought were my friends which led things to get even worse.
i relpased on alchol (which isnt gonna be good for my stomach or liver currently) and i did with sh as well. i needed stiches again but i begged my fiance to not take me becasue i couldnt survive another ward visit.
so im having to basicly not move for a few days at least till it scabs over enough to not reopen. i know im saying all of this to an empty void. im fine with that.
i just have no where else to talk about these struggles.
and maybe, if i dont make it, weather i end it myself or my body does it for me, there will be a record of me somewhere. anywhere at all.
Vally-kalma[OP]
27.05.2024 06:52
Linki would love to draw right now. express how im feeling in any way. but i just cant. no matter what i do i just cant seem to make something worth posting. worth seeing. or worth doing. everything has sucked any bit of joy i had for this hobby. and it makes me sad that i might not be able to do this for much longer. ive given up with almost everything. my relatiosnhips. my family. my health. id say hygene but that stopped months ago. i stopped caring if i was trans. i stopped caring about the bullies, the harrasment. im not sure whats next for me.
all i know is the only thing ive felt the last 2 months, is fear.
i really dont know what to do from here.