I tell myself everyday.. 'no one cares.. theyll only turn away..' "No one cares" "No one cares" "No one cares" "No one cares" And everyday it becomes more and more true..

MY MOM DOESNT CARE MY DAD, MY STEPMOM, MY LITTLE BRO, LITTLE SIS, BIG BRO, UNCLES, AUNTS.. THEY ALL SAY THEY DO.. BUT THEY DONT IK MY FRIENDS DO.. BUT I CANT OPEN UP ALL THE WAY BC I FEEL LIKE THEYD BE OVERWHELMED AND LEAVE.. WHEN I FOUND OUT MY FRIEND JAIME WANTED/ALMOST KILLED HERSELF I WAS HEARTBROKEN BC THE DAY OR SO BEFORE I TOLD HER ABOUT MY 6-8 ATTEMPTS

(now my attempt count is like.. 10-12..? Idk) I feel like I seem like a attention seeker no matter what I do.. When I walk away from a situation When I get hurt When I ask for smth When I say smth When I talk in a convo When I interupt someone bc something happened

Why? Y y y yY y Y y y Y Y y Y y yY Y

I make jokes about jumping off cliffs, bridges, rooftops, etc, and shooting myself, and stabbing, and hitting my head repeatitively on purpose.. yet little do ppl know.. it's all bc I really do feel that way at that time.. and I really do wanna do that and probs would If I could

PEOPLE THINK IM WEIRD, MEAN, RUDE, STUPID, SCARY, ETC SO THEY EITHER STAY AWAY OR THEY ATTACK.. when they attack.. they find out my weakness...after finding out my weakness they harass..assualt.. and plenty more I don't wanna talk about..

I got mentally harassed, physically assaulted, and physically harassed the other day when I was offline..

I'm still in pain bc of it.. I've got bruises, scars, scrapes, and a sprained wrist bc of their attack.. THEY ATTACK BC IM TRANSGENDER

MAYBE IT ALL WOULDVE BEEN FINE IF I DIDNT COME OUT MAYBE IF I BOTTLED IT ALL UP LIKE EVERYTHING ELSE IT WOULDNT HAVE HAPPENED

Its probably true.. because everything was fine.. until I came out.. so maybe if I retract my words and return to 'she and her and Aubree's maybe life will fix itself..

**** **** ****.. IM JUST A WORTHLESS PEICE OF SHIT IM NOT WORTH THEIR TIME IM A PEASANT COMPARED TO THEM