i cant take it

normally i see my dreams as a way to escape now it is being taken away from me its just me reliving shit that happened in the past

and it is becoming more and more ****ed up and i want to just stop sleeping

i wake up in a cold ****ing sweat terrified that something is going to happen to me

**** YOU HAYDEN YOU CALL ME A WHORE AND SHIT FOR NO REASON BECAUSE I PUT MY FACE AS MY PFP ON SOMETHING?? REALLY??? YOU TRY TOUCHING ME ALL THE TIME YOU GET THE CHANCE AND I LET IT SLIP BY WHAT THE **** IS WRONG WITH YOU, YOU ARE SUCH A SICK PERVERT **** YOU YOU ARE OLDER THAN ME BY A YEAR I WISH YOU GOT HELD BACK ANOTHER YEAR YOUR ASSHOLE BROTHER IS BETTER THAN YOU NASTY ****ER I HOPE YOU DIE YOU ARE HANGING ON A ****ING THREAD YOU KNOW HOW QUICKLY I CAN JUST LET OUT EVERYTHING YOU HAVE DONE TO ME TO THE TEACHERS AND OUR FRIENDS AND BRYCE AND WILLIAM AND JORDAN WOULD WANT NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU BECAUSE YOU ARE A ****ING CREEP TO ME. YOU ARE SO ****ING GRROSS I CANT BELIEVE I AM FRIENDS WITH YOU I WANT YOU AWAY FROM ME

I SERIOUSLY FEEL LIKE I SHOULD TELL EVERYONE WHAT YOU DO TO ME BECAUSE THIS IS DISGUSTING YOU ARE THE REASON I VIEW MOST GUYS THE WAY I DO I ****ING HATE YOU YOU KNOW WHAT? WHEN BRYCE COMES BACK I WILL TELL HIM EVERYTHING YOU HAVE EVER DONE TO ME BECAUSE YOU ARE A SICK BASTARD AND AT LEAST HE KNOWS WHAT NOT TO DO AND YOU CALL HIM A PRICK? AT LEAST HE DOESNT GO AROUND TOUCHING GIRLS YOU CALL HIM FAT AND SHIT? I LIKE HIM BECAUSE HE IS NOT A CREEPY ASS ***** AND HE DOESNT SEXUALIZE ME WHEN I AM JUST TRYING TO BE MYSELF AND NOT EVEN SEXUAL AT ALL THIS IS WHY I WEAR BAGGY SHIT AND NEVER SHOW MY BODY ANYMORE I HATE ALL GUYS

HAYDEN YOU ARE LIKE 16 YOU SHOULD KNOW NOT TO TOUCH A 14 YEAR OLD LIKE THAT

JUST BECAUSE YEARS AGO WHEN I SAID I WOULD BE YOUR GIRLFRIEND DOESNT MEAN YOU GET A RIGHT TO MY PHONE AND BODY. ITS NOT HOW THAT WORKS DUMBASS

I WAS 11. I WAS ****ING ELEVEN WHEN YOU FIRST DID THAT I DIDNT EVEN KNOW WHAT CUM WAS. I WAS SERIOUSLY A CHILD AND YOU WERE LIKE 13

im telling bryce. him and Kasey are the only ones i trust with this shit aswell as maxi but like they cant do anything about it. bryce is friends with him not knowing what he has done to me and how he affected me and it is just gross bryce is gone rn but when he comes back i will definitely tell him