I worked so hard, It's literally my first time getting an "A+" like 3 in a row and one solid A, that's really good but.. I want something for it... I want to be fricking rewarded for it, all this time. I now realize that, life isn't just fair. I yelled at my grandma a on Sunday last week. I had a severe anxiety attack, did a self-harm attempt, and having suicide thoughts. I was scared, I don't care about anyone but I do. I just don't care about myself, I only care for others because I love them and I don't love me, not focused on me.. I really ****ing hate myself. and I care about all people. I don't know, i feel like im being ****ing controlled by my family, I feel like shit. I dont understand bro like leave me alone i do what the **** I want to do.