only person who even wants to talk to me anymore is andy and i wonder what i did wrong and why i am cripplingly lonely because every relationship im in platonic or even romantic ends up bad cos of me because i did something wrong and im never told what its about i just hate so many people and myself god i hate myself so much even sometiems i hear my family talk shit about me when they think j cant hear i wish i wasnt completely unloveable i really wonder what its like for people to genuinely enjoy your presence