And that I’m trapped inside this box I can’t seem to break out of

It hurts inside it really does.

I want to be there for everyone

But that’s not what my mind tells me to do. My heart is telling me to love who I want and be friends with the right people

My mind tells me to be friends with those who hurt me.

There’s only one way I can try to love someone

It’s if I hurt them.

Lie to them.

Make them hate before I am able to tell them I love them dearly-

They leave me- leave me alone and I cry myself to sleep Wondering why- and then I realize why-

It hurts to much I feel like that’s what I’m doing now.

I can’t tell if it’s because I’m just stupid

Or it’s the type of person I am...

I’m already tried killing my self last month but I couldn’t do it

I told my friend and they panicked... I worried them by not answering

I felt bad and that I’m starting to ****ing hurt them

I just want to be able to love someone the right way. I hate hurting people. I hate having them leave me. I hate it I hate it I hate it.