i was reallyyy really violently suicidal (like i was making a plan and was about to go thru with it kind of violently) last week and then i woke up one day and ive been deliriously happy since . i havent felt a single bad emotion in like 5 days. i dont even feel bad now. i dont know

like u would think thats a good thing but its really offputting

for me

idkkkkk idk what it is

flipanim diagnose me NOW....!!

jjst kidding i really do need to get a therapist or a psychatrist or something im tired of having weird ass symptoms and no explanation for it

oh ya im getting a job soon too

i dont careeeeee 🍭🍭

my eyes keep blurring togethr it pmo so bad thats probably not good but#idontcare...❤️

DUDEE dude ive been listening tk george clanton nonstop recently

every 'era' of my life has a song that i obsess over and listen to on repeat and the one for whatever tf has been going on this past month or so is livin' loose by george clanton

i think of them like little theme songs cause whatever goes on in my life makes me associate these songs with the events that happen to me. my first semester of freshman year was entirely defined by Until i Die by machine girl cause it released around that time and i listened to it nonstop in my graphic design class first thing in the morning

i still associate that song with taking naps instead of doing work and computers

my 8th grade song of choice was status by machine girl, and my 6th(?) grade theme song was restoration of the neglected by rebzyyx

i dont remember much of 7th but i think my song for most pf that year was movies for guys by jane remover

u can rlly see my development over the years wow❤️❤️

WAIT 6th was either that or edgy by luvwillow. same genre i think. i was a weird kid💔 i forgive myself tho i was doing ROUGHH througout all of middle school it was bad

i got a haircut btw and im planning on bleaching it on friday w my friends

idkkkk whatevr im going to sleep im having trouble focusing my eyes and im tiredd

WAIT before i go. i have ONE song i consider my ACTUAL theme song and its Lilith by machine girl. ive always thought that song sounded like me in a way. idk why. its good tho listen to it ❗️❗️❗️ ok gn