i wait for her to come back i see her waiting for me at the back door, or snuggled in my blanket only to realize my eyes play cruel tricks on me i smell her sometimes, her unique, slightly disgusting smell that i had grown to love and get used to, yet my nose play cruel tricks on me. i feel her. my hands play cruel tricks. i hear her bark. or her claws tick on the floor. my ears play cruel tricks on me.