Why is it when I get hella sleepy and sad I just start hurting characters mentally

Lets emotionally scar this character for the rest of their lives yaayyyy

I should probably go to bed

I have Said several things I normally wouldn't say to this one friend To them I'm normally laid back and chill They're now seeing the chaotic, no filter side of me And mixed in with an angsty mood? They are afraid

Me eyes hurt