why didnt xe listen

xe knew all I do is hurt the people close to me.

I don't deserve anything

I'm a narcissist. I'm an idiot. I cant do anything right. I only hurt the people who trust me. Why so they trust me. I want to lock myself away so I can't feel anything anymore. So I can't hurt people. So I don't do anything stupid. So they don have to see me anymore. God I feel so weak when I cry. Oh I'm so pitiful.

do*

I don't deserve anyone. I only end up hurting them. I DON'T KNOW MY OWN FEELINGS ANYMORE. WHO DO I LOVE? IS IT JUST FREIND SHIP? A SILLY CRUSH? I DON'T DESERVE HAPPYNESS. I DON'T DESERVE TO CRY. WHATS THE POINT IN LIVING IF I DONT HAVE HIR?? BUT I DON'T DESERVE HIR. XE DESERVES BETTER. I DESERVE A LIFE SENTENCE OF NOTHING. I ONLY DESERVE PAIN. NO SADNESS. NO PITY. NOTHING. WE LIVE. WE GO TO SCHOOL. WE GET A JOB. WE HUNCH OVER A DESK UNTIL WE DIE. MONEY MONEY MONEY. LIFE IS MEANINGLESS. WE LIVE, EAT AND WORK UNTIL WE ALL ROT. THERE'S NO ****ING POINT TO ANYTHING.