i dont know if this is me giving up on transitioning and trying to detransition myself or it was a phase or im a man and a girl or what

theres alot of people ive seen say if im not putting effort into looking like a man im not trans and i dont think theyre right for it but i do have the option to look more like a dude and imnnot choosing that option and actually i was choosing that option for a while but jow im trying to like make myself look cis again

i dont know i have a gut feeling im atleast sort of trans

calling myself a girl doesnt feel right but its probably just my brain being like but ive been a dude for two years and ive been so defensive about it too how could i be a girl

also i really ****ing hate men like so much i hate men

idk how im gonna tell my friends i dont feel comfortable talking abt it rn but like its probably not good to pretend to be trans when im not

i havent even figured it out yet hthough so

i could rant abt how much i hate men all day

literally