Untitled
by:
artist-boy 
65
65
22.04.2020
81 comments
artist-boy[OP]
25.04.2020 06:55
Linkare you here?
I feel used. My dads mentally abusive and he killed my little brother when he was 1 and a half.
I'm always the support beam to my friends when I needed support the most
I'm falling apart.
I'm broken past fixable...**** that, I'm SHATTERED.
So I joke about it and lie.
I'm fat, which is probably the reason that im anorexic. Im a nervous wreck and I never feel good about myself...
I'm tired all the time
my head always hurts...
I wanna sleep...
Just once...I don't even know what happiness feels like anymore...Why wont it stop...?
well i can tell you one thing, ive hardly met you
but i already care.
i can relate to this:I'm always the support beam to my friends when I needed support the most
could you tell me more about that?
for me i love to draw, make art create stuff out of nothing! whenever im sad i just draw and let my imagination run wild thats my happy thing
Well it seems like my friends are always sad or suicidal and struggling, but since I care, I try to help them before something bad could happen, example, them cutting or harming themselfs...And I feel theres never enough space for my issues, and I don't wanna throw my issue in the dog pile of bullcrap people gotta put up with and I don't want people to ignore there issues for mine because I know how painfull that is...
I'll talk to you tomorrow...mayble sleeping for a while will let me feel better...
i agree.
one of my friends has depression, i helped him through it suggested stuff helped him but felt my issues werent important enough. i even cared to talk to him that he should try to get better grades and helped him. i never mentioned my issues onece.
So every night I puke it up. I sleep late to avoid food but I miss the hunger pain. I want to feel hunger pain.
here i found this
https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/
https://www.thehotline.org/help/
https://www.helpguide.org/articles/eating-disorders/eating-disorder-treatment-and-recovery.htm
I don't want it to stop. I'm not going to far I promise...I haven't overstepped...
The pain I get from it makes me feel something and its better than being emtpy inside.
I understand now...the pain...is what made me happy when I was younge.
well how are you not going to far to make pain.. for yourself, because you enjoy it?
Because I know I deserve it. Pain makes me happy if its hunger pain...I get it now! Thats why I was always so sad! I was eating normallly for a week...I understand now!!
so let me get this straight..
your happy when you dont eat cause you know you deserve the pain?
And on TOP of that, not eating makes me skinny! Best of BOTH worlds!
i want to help you. but pain is bad!
you dont deserve it
you need to eat food and not puke it up
Skinny is good because I can be pretty for once...i am gonna sleep, also I shouted u out :3
i promise im not ur bully ive never been never will be a bully just a skinny kid