i can't stand it here in this rat hole anymore i can't wait to get out. im so tired of you treating me like im less then human, im tired of you making me feel like a ****ing slave. you are a grown ass women, you can get up and walk a few feet to get a ****ing clothes basket, you can get your own clothes from the bathroom, you can make your own food you can throw away your own trash. im so sick of you using the 'im the oldest' or the 'im always in pain' excuses. you're not the only one in pain you're not the only one overwhelmed you're not ****ing special you're ****ing 39. im so close to just packing my shit and calling opa, i want to live with him because i can at least get time to myself, they want to spend time with me, time that doesn't include me doing shit for them and i getting nothing out of it, time thats not just watching whatever they want. they even let me sleep in and don't call me lazy i mean for ****s sake, i was able to catch up on school work the whole week i was there because i

didn't have to get up every five minutes to get them food or something five feet away. and speaking of food you judge us for what we eat when everytime i turn around you want me to make you half a bag of ****ing pizzarolls. im sick of you playing favorites too. my sister literally could be sitting right next to you and you call me to make you food or take care of your trash. what the **** are you gonna do when i move out? because i sure as hell am not coming all the way from wherever i am to make you some ****ing food. im sick of you making me feel like a shit Kid because i keep thinking ill be better off with out you screaming at me because i did something the wrong way or your food is to cold, hate when you get pissy when i want to be left alone and give you attitude. i hate you. i can't stand you. you make me hate myself, my home, my family and at times the way i look. i hate when you call me names i hate i can't hid in my room like my sister i hate you play favorites i hate being your ****ing s

son. you don't even use the right pronouns or name. you don't even try. im not your daughter anymore. hate when you say things like "you're the best son" to my brother it makes me feel worse. you want respect but you don't give any in return. you don't get shit you don't deserve it. ill never tell you any of this, im to afraid you're just gonna disregard my feelings and yell at me for being a shit kid, play victim and cry, make me have to say sorry for feeling emotions. you always do that when i try.

i can't even show you things im proud of without an "im busy" or "yeah mhm" i don't want to show you my art anymore you just give the same answer everytime. im not asking you if it looks cool, i was proud of it and wanted to show it off. you're never to busy to take a moment to look, stop staring at that phone and look at me do i mean nothing? what did i do to be your least favorite? why do you treat me like that?