congrats to whoever was praying on my downfall ig

this was only months ago this was so recent how has it all gone to shit i miss when we first met im too emotionally attached please i didnt mean it im victimizing myself again please i hate flipanim i hate him i dont actually and i damn well know that he thinks i hate him maybe im being manipulative again writing this all down is so ****ing dumb sounding i cant cope with this i dont feel nostalgic i only ever feel sad how do i enjoy memories i never want that to end summer 2021 dont wven want to be on the couch in the house in utah ever ever again i never want to ride my bike again i never want to go to that lake again ill cry and cry and cry i feel so guilty i feel so guilty im acting just like my mother right now im acting just like my mother and i hate it i cried so much i cried forever i feel just like my mother i cant ****ing do this i want to kill myself i dont know what will happen in rhe future ill be just like my mother ill be just like her i dont know how to stop i dont know what to do i dont kno