So, first i guess ill talk about more recent events. Ig life is actually going a little calmer now for me. But um a few weeks ago i just heard my Opa (grandpa) has cancer. Hes a heavy smoker, but i believe he has been tryna quit. Over top of that he already had conditions that made it hard for him to breath. He is going in to get the tumor removed or something, but we think he may only live for a year at the most. As thats expected when one is diagnosed with cancer. Honestly, i think when he passes its going to hit my mom pretty hard, and i wanna support her.

School is going great but, i just feel behind since i dont get to participate in most of the activities and school work. Reason being is beacuse im going to school part time, not fully. Creating a lot of stress, i have to balance school, home and supporting my family. Now i know they dont expect me to always be there and ready to hug them. And i wont. I am glad i even get to spend time with my fam, freinds and get access to an education. But now, it just wears me out.

Now, irl freinds. Heh. I get to see most of them. But covid has made it so people cant travel much. Last year my bff moved and changed schools. And this was the year that i needed her. So we could support each other through covid and school. But ever since she has moved its made it hard to talk to her. I dont have her phone number, so she has to call me, and i dont have her address, so until she sends me a letter we have almost no communication. Expect for messaging, which shes normally busy. Maybe this is a sign that we arnt destinated to be together forever. Idk, but it makes me sad. Then i had another friend move this week. She however i have no conact with her, she moved too far away to drive and i dont have her number, and i cant message her.

My brothers best friend past away last year. It hit me hard, it hit the fam hard. He was young, and one of the first true freinds my bro has made in years. And my brother struggles a lot, and i worry about him. But he has been doing better than i thought he would, so im proud of him. But last year that wasnt the only death that happened, there was another person i knew that helped the community a whole lot. They did lots of events and so. That one hit hard for me. Than my friends dog passed away, a good ol corgi. He was just about as old as me. And you know, its hard seeing dogs suffer, so they put him down.

Now, this vent was mainly just to express myself and let it out. So my feelings wouldn't be bottled up.

Hm?

Ahhh! Ty jay, <3