mom help me someone is on the roof oh wait its just the fat man he came for the cookies he gave us presents

lmfao

i'll take those presents as payment for killing my dog-

Hey, at least he brings some fresh venison

don’t leave the cookies out after midnight, he’ll find you and stuff you into a reindeer costume

got Santa a treadmill for Christmas but he sold it on craigslist that ****ing whore 😡

Raisin cookies