Ritsu
whale thingy >w<
strangecat has fleas
Emotional
frogie (gift for a loved one )
- Fleeting Starlight -
🌸
Untitled
83 comments
Jade-Da-Pun-Master
01.12.2019 02:17
LinkIdk
Jade-Da-Pun-Master
01.12.2019 02:18
LinkGuys, what did they do wrong? Just a tad bit confused here😅
goopjuice
01.12.2019 02:19
Linkmoonlitdove said she'll explain dw
Jade-Da-Pun-Master
01.12.2019 02:20
LinkMk
not to leave this account and start another one, but to leave this ****ing website
since I know Calvin will comment but if you're a Calvin supporter reading this ask me on one of my anims and I'll give information as to why to Calvin is a peice of shit.
So I was searching for a new car, which one’s me? A cool convertible or an SUV? Too bad I didn’t know that my credit was whack, ‘cause now I’m rolling out the lot in a used sub-compact. F-R-E-E, that spells free, creditreport.com, baby! Saw their ads on my TV, thought about calling but was too lazy. Now instead of looking fly and rolling fat, my feet stick to the vinyl and my possy’s gettin’ laughed at. F-R-E-E, that spells free, creditreport.com, baby!
To go **** yourself off this site. Don’t make a new account, we always find you. Get off this site altogether before I ****ing rip into you.
You gonna cry? Piss your pants maybe? Maybe shit and cum? Well feel free to do that on my carpet! Empire Today is having a premium sale on carpets! And guess what? They are offering free carpet replacements! So get yourself a brand new carpet today! (And don’t go to creditreports.com!!) Call (800)-588-2300! https://youtu.be/uwJQQux0TF0
Getting a prescription for VIAGRA starts with talking to a doctor about your symptoms. If you’re ready to have your VIAGRA Talk, here are some ways to help start the conversation. VIAGRA is not right for everyone, but your doctor can prescribe VIAGRA if he thinks it’s right for you. And you will need a prescription.
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Holy ****ing shit why the **** cheese is so gotdamn expensive I swear to gad what's so special about the ****en cheese that a little piece of it costs more than a meal in mcdonalds and im talking about average cheese not the blue brie french cheese or whatever
So you're going by "Octavian" now plebian? Haha what's up spurcifer, it's Tannerius from Rome. Remember me? Me and the other legionaries used to give a hard time. Sorry you were just an easy target. I can see not much has changed. Remember Seira, the girl you had a crush on? Yeah, she's my concubine now. I make over 200 sesterces a year and drive a quadriga chariot. I guess some things never change huh? Nice catching up. Patheticus.
Donald's arm collapsed under him with the force of the ****ing he was getting. His face mashed into the pillow on his king size bed, and his head started rhythmically bumping against the headboard. He tried to ignore his discomfort, focusing instead on the fact that he had no idea when he'd again get a chance to feel this good, to get ****ed this deeply and thoroughly. One hand was between his legs, stroking his fat six inch cock; he had fallen onto the other. He was propped up on that elbow, his hand straining to graze one of his nipples. He was sweating, having been ****ed already for ten minutes. He knew from experience he was probably going to get another half hour or so. A jolt of pleasure coursed through him as he was smacked, hard on his smooth right ass cheek. "Yeah, baby," said a deep sexy voice, "you like that, don't you? I love how your big ass flexes when you get spanked." Donald felt another smack, harder this time, and he let out an involuntary moan and, reflexively, flexed his hard muscular ass
Donald pushed his arms back under himself, and looked down his torso. He was on all fours, his massive smooth body was taut, freshly shaved, freshly worked out, and perfectly defined. His massive pecs heaved with each plunging stroke into his ass, and his abs were tight, trying to balance Donald's big 6'4" frame against the powerful ****ing abuse it was taking. The only hair on his body, was the carefully trimmed bush at the base of Donald's fat six inch cock, which was totally hard and tightly flexed up against Donald's stomach. His smooth nuts were tight against his body, resting between Donald's thick smooth legs. As usual, Donald had shaved his legs that morning, and his massive quads, still sore from his morning workout, were straining to push back against the hard pounding his ass was taking. Donald loved his body---he would admit, privately, that he was totally a narcissist 'you would be, too,' he would always say to himself as he watched himself in a mirror. He felt another hard thwack against his bac
thwack against his backside, and watched his pecs tighten against the heave the most recent stroke had caused. Between his legs, Donald could see two heavy, massive nuts swinging back and forth with the momentum of the **** he was getting. Donald and Barack Obama had first met in 2010. They were the two biggest names in America and Donald had been curious since he came to town to find out if Barack was up for ****ing him. One night in 2008, Donald went over to his buddy Vladimir's place for a party for locals. Barack was there, looking sexy in casual shorts and a Slayer tshirt. Donald kept trying to catch a glimpse of what was swinging between his legs, but he couldn't get any intel. After everyone had some food and a few drinks, Donald went to take a piss. He wasn't paying attention and walked right into the bathroom while Barack was taking a leak. The 6'8" stud had his shorts down and his huge snake in his hand. Donald tried to stammer an apology and back away, but he was entranced. Barack knew it, too. He
Barack knew it, too. He smiled and beckoned Donald to come in and close the door. Donald soon met Barack's massive eleven inch cut cock with its gorgeously shaped pink mushroom head and the huge nuts to match. Donald was instantly hooked on Barack from the first sight, and the long, deep ****ing he got that night left him addicted. Ever since, Donald did whatever was necessary to make sure he got ****ed at least once every week by Barack's big monster. "Take that big cock, baby," said Barack, licking his lips as he plunged the full eleven inch length of his cock in and out of Donald's hole. "Milk my dick like you want it, *****." Barack gave Donald another smack on his ass, leaving a massive hand-shaped red mark on the smooth skin. Donald's ass clenched with the spank, and he could feel his ass tightening around the merciless invader. The room was silent, except for Barack's talk, the occasional smack on Donald's ass, and the regular sound of Barack's tight body ramming into Donald's firm ass, his heavy nuts
his heavy nuts bouncing against Donald's legs. Donald was in heaven, letting out a long low moan of pleasure as Barack's cock pounded nearly a foot inside him and then left him empty and aching to be filled again. Donald had done as Barack liked. He took a shower an hour before Barack showed up, taking extra care to make sure he was completely clean. Then he shaved his arms and legs like he did before a game. Then he put on a tight pair of white briefs and nothing else. The curtains were drawn in Donald's room, and the light from the adjoining bathroom was the only light in the room. Donald had stripped his comforter off the bed, leaving only the white sheets and pillows. Donald opened his garage door, so Barack wouldn't been seen coming in, turned off lights in the house, and then went to the bed and laid down on his stomach. Barack walked into the bedroom with a "yeah, baby" at the sight of the smooth impossibly well-muscled stud in his briefs and nothing else. Barack was in a wife beater and a pair of loos
loose sweats, tied off so that they hung low on his muscular ass. Barack took a knee on the bed, and slapped Donald's ass. Barack loved how big and round the QB's muscle ass looked in the tiny white briefs. He started stroking his big monster through his sweatpants as he caressed Donald's big muscle ass. Donald looked over his shoulder, showing Barack his perfect white teeth, and moaned appreciatively as Barack's hands started running all over Donald's ass. "Damn, you're pretty, boy," said Barack, getting up and walking toward Donald's head. He pulled the muscular white boy up onto his knees, and Donald dove into Barack's chest, running his tongue over Barack's chest hair, as Barack peeled off his wife beater. Donald worked his way down Barack's tight, muscled stomach, bathing the taller man in his spit. Donald dove his face into the crotch of Barack's sweatpants, and tried to wrap his lips around Barack's quickly hardening cock. Barack reached down Donald's body, and ran his hands under Donald's briefs. He g
He grabbed a fistful of Donald's hard ass, and Donald could feel his cock jump. "****, boy, I'm going to miss this ass when you leave." "Damn, Barack, this ass is going to be lonely out in Denver," said Donald matter-of-factly. "You'll have to give it one hell of a sendoff." He peeled down Barack's sweats, grabbed the fat monster by the base, barely able to wrap his big hands around the base. He opened his mouth, and took four or five inches into his throat. Barack's cock throbbed as it quickly hardened. Barack had his hands down in Donald's crack, his thick fingers teasing around the warm hole. He pulled his cock out of Donald's throat, and turned the football stud around, so he could see that big, beautiful ass. Barack pulled off the tight briefs, revealing the perfectly round, hard muscle ass that he had conquered. With the briefs out of the way, Barack dove into the smooth, hairless crack, and started tonguing Donald's hole. Donald loved the way Barack rimmed him, and the tall man had a massive, and power
and powerful, tongue. Barack had Donald relaxed and opened up in no time, and had Donald ready to get ****ed. Now, almost twenty minutes into the ****, Barack was covered in sweat, and Donald wanted a better view. Fortunately, Barack was ready for a change. "Roll over, boy," said Barack, withdrawing his huge dick from Donald's gaping hole. "Let me see that pretty face of yours." Barack's head popped out of Donald's hole, and he felt like he was gaping wide open after the pummeling his poor hole had taken. Donald rolled onto his back, his cock still rockhard against his flat stomach. His legs were shaking from the ****ing he had taken, and it felt fantastic to finally take his weight off them. He stretched his massive arms up over his head, and felt his muscles relax. Barack moved onto the bed, and was stroking his cock while he watched his beautiful white **** toy stretch himself out on the bed. Donald loved how hot Barack looked, Barack's massive dick was rock hard and sli
, Barack's massive dick was rock hard and slick with lube and sweat and spit, having just plowed into the muscle stud. Barack's tattoos were glistening with sweat that was dripping down his face and collecting in the valleys of his cut, muscular torso. His abs and pecs were heaving with each breath. Barack looked like such a stud, and Donald couldn't wait to drain his load out of his nuts.
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AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
I don't like you T-Series
Nothing personal kid
But I must go all out
Just this once
Bobs or vegana, whichever will it be?
Sit the **** down T-Series, I'm here to spill the real tea
You tryna dethrone me from spot on number one
But you India, you lose, so best think you haven't won
When I'm through with you we're gonna be completely ****in' done
'Cause we only just begun
I review you, *clap clap* zero, bye *****, gone
So come on T-Series, looking hungry for some drama
Here, let me serve you ***** lasagna
***** lasagna, ***** lasagna
T-Series ain't nothing, but a ***** lasagna
***** lasagna, ***** lasagna
Look at T-Series they just crying for their mama
***** lasagna, ***** lasagna
***** lasagna, ***** lasagna
*****, *****, *****, *****
*****, *****, *****, *****
***** lasagna!
Hey!
***** lasagna, ***** lasagna, ***** lasagna
T-Series ain't nothing, but a ***** lasagna
***** lasagna, ***** lasagna
Look at T-Series they just crying for their mama
So who the hell is Bob and why you wanna kiss him? (ew)
I'm a blue eyes white dragon while you're just dark magician (oof)
You got a fifth of the population in your nation but
I got nine-year-olds of worlds so hold your defecation (oops)
Motu Patlu, what the **** is that even supposed to mean?
Your language sounds like it came from a mumble rap community
No, papa, no, papa, yes, papa, Johnny
Now down all of this sugar and let's throw this ****ing party with some
***** lasagna, ***** lasagna
Look at T-Series they just crying for their mama
***** lasagna, ***** lasagna
T-Series ain't nothing, but a ***** lasagna
***** lasagna, ***** lasagna
So there I was, putting on my rape shoes, and practicing my sexual harassment pickup lines this morning. I just got done cyberbullying my coworkers. It was time to shave, I yelled at my wife to smile because I demand it, while pinching her butt right after she told me she didn't consent to it. Putting on the shaving cream and thinking about how I can get my son into a fight at the next BBQ, I replaced the worn Gillette brand Mach3 and began to chant "boys will be boys" as I started to shave. Then suddenly my daughter burst into the bathroom holding her phone. As I began to mansplain to her why she isn't smart enough to know my shaving time is my time she showed me the new Gillette ad. I realized how my every view and behavior I've ever held dear was wrong. I'm calling in sick at the toxic masculinity factory today and registering Democrat. Thanks Gillette, now excuse me while I help to impeach.
I went to the supermarket earlier today, to buy some cheese and bacon, you know? So I went up to the girl working there and she said: "Good morning, how can I help you?"
I couldn't believe this naughty ***** was offering herself to me at 7 am, but I managed to keep myself calm and said: "Good morning. I want 300g of mozzarella cheese and 300g of bacon please."
She started working on my order, and after a while she came to me and said "Sir, I acidentally put 350g of cheese instead of 300g. Can I leave it or do you want me to take some off?"
Holy ****ing shit. I couldn't believe what this cum-addicted slut just said. She knew I only wanted 300g of cheese, but instead of giving me what I asked for she decided to try to have sex with me. I'm gonna explain it to you: what's the difference between 300g and 350g of cheese? That's right, 50 grams. What else has 50 grams? Yes, that's the average weight of a condom packaging, and also the average amount of sperm expelled during a sexual act.
And worst of all, do you know which sentence has 50 letters? "Oh daddy please destroy my pussy and cum in my little slut ass".
I was shocked at the audacity of this whore, but I was better than this. I told her to take a little bit of cheese off, and she said: "is 308g alright sir?" I was shaking and sharting at this point. I couldn't believe she was humiliating herself like this. Do you know what has 8 letters? "I love you". But I didn't love her, I didn't love this attention deprived thot back. So I just said: "I'm not going to give in to your schemes. You should value yourself more, you are better than this".
As I was paying for my products at the cashier I could hear a great commotion, and I saw that the girl and all the other female employees were crying in unison. I left the supermarket knowing that I did the right thing.
since I know Calvin will comment but if you're a Calvin supporter reading this ask me on one of my anims and I'll give information as to why to Calvin is a peice of shit.
since I know Calvin will comment but if you're a Calvin supporter reading this ask me on one of my anims and I'll give information as to why to Calvin is a peice of shit.
since I know Calvin will comment but if you're a Calvin supporter reading this ask me on one of my anims and I'll give information as to why to Calvin is a peice of shit.
Divorced
Beheaded
Died
Divorced
Beheaded
Survived
And tonight, we are...
Live!
Listen up let me tell you a story
A story that you think you've heard before
We know you know our names and our fame and our faces
Know all about the glories and the disgraces
I'm done 'cause all this time
I've been just one word in a stupid rhyme
So I picked up a pen and a microphone
History's about to get overthrown
Divorced
Beheaded
Died
Divorced
Beheaded
Survived
But just for you tonight
We're divorced, beheaded, live!
Welcome to the show, to the historemix
Switching up the flow as we add the prefix
Everybody knows that we used to be six wives
Raising up the roof till we hit the ceiling
Get ready for the truth that we'll be revealing
Everybody knows that we used to be six wives
But now we're
Ex-Wives
All you ever hear and read about
Is our ex and the way it ended
But a pair doesn't beat a royal flush
You're gonna find out how we got, unfriended
Tonight we're gonna do ourselves justice
'Cause we're taking you to court
And every Tudor rose has its thorns
And you're gonna hear 'em live
In consort
Divorced
Beheaded
Died
Divorced
Beheaded
Survived
But just for you tonight
We're divorced, beheaded, live!
Welcome to the show, to the historemix
Switching up the flow as we add the prefix
Everybody knows that we used to be six wives
Dancing to the beat till the break of day, once
We're done we'll start again like it's the Renaissance
Everybody knows that we used to be six wives
But now we're
Ex-Wives
My name's Catherine of Aragon
Was married twenty-four years I'm a paragon
Of royalty, my loyalty is to the Vatican
So if you try to dump me
You won't try that again
I'm that Boleyn girl and I'm up next
See I broke England from the church
Yeah I'm that sexy
Why did I lose my head?
Well my sleeves may be green but my lipstick's red
Jane Seymour the only one he truly loved
(Rude)
When my son was newly born, I died
But I'm not what I seem or am I?
Stick around and you'll suddenly see more
Ich bin Anne of Cleves
Ja
When he saw my portrait he was like
Ja!
But I didn't look as good as good as I did in my pic
Funny how we all discuss that but never Henry's little-
Prick up your ears I'm the Catherine who lost her head
(Beheaded)
For my promiscuity outside of wed
Lock up your husbands
Lock up your sons
K Howard is here and the fun's begun
Five down I'm the final wife
I saw him to the end of his life
I'm the survivor Catherine Parr
I bet you wanna know how I got this far
I said I bet you wanna know how we got this far
Do you wanna know how we got this far then?
Welcome to the show, to the historemix
Switching up the flow as we add the prefix
Everybody knows that we used to be six wives
Get your hands up, get this party buzzing
You want a queen bee, well there's half a dozen
Everybody knows that we used to be six wives
But now we're
Ex-Wives
One, two, three, four, five... six!
Welcome to the house
To the Haus of Holbein
Ja, ooh ja, das ist gut
Ooh ja, ja
The Haus of Holbein
Hans Holbein goes around the world
Painting all of the beautiful girls
From Spain, to France
And Germany
The king chooses one
But which one will it be?
You bring the corsets
We'll bring the cinches
No one wants a waist over nine inches
So what the make up contains lead poison?
At least your complexion will bring all the boys in
Ignore the fear and you'll be fine
We'll turn this vier into a nine
So just say 'ja' and don't say 'nein'
'Cause now you're in the house
In the Haus of Holbein!
Ja, ooh ja, das ist gut
Ooh ja, ja
The Haus of Holbein
We must make sure the princesses look great
When their time comes for the Holbein portrait
We know what all the best inventions are
To hold everything up
Ja, it's wunderbar
For blonder hair, then you just add a
Magical ingredient from your bladder
Try these heels, so high it's naughty
But we cannot guarantee that you'll still walk at forty
Ignore the fear and you'll be fine
We'll turn this vier into a nine
So just say 'ja' and don't say 'nein'
'Cause now you're in the house
In the Haus of Holbein!
Ooh ja, das ist gut
Ooh ja, ja
The Haus of Holbein
Grew up in the French court,
Oui, oui bonjour.
Life was a chore so, She set sail.
1522, came straight to the UK,
All the British dudes lame. Epic fail.
OooOoo, I wanna dance and sing.
Politics, not my thing.
OooOoo, but then I met the king,
And soon my daddy said "You should try to get ahead"
He wanted me, hah, obviously,
Messaging me like everyday.
Couldn't be better then he sent me a letter,
And who am I kidding I was Prêt-à-manger.
OooOoo, sent a reply.
OooOoo, Just sayin' hi.
OooHoo, you're a nice guy,
I'll think about it maybe xo baby.
Uh oh...
Here we go..
You sent him kisses?
I didn't know I would move in with his misses.
What?!
Get a life!
You're living with his wife?
Like, what was I meant to do?
Sorry, not sorry bout', what I said,
I'm just tryna' have some fun.
Don't worry, don't worry,
don't lose your head, I didn't mean to hurt anyone...
L-O-L, say "Oh well", or go to hell.
I'm sorry not sorry bout' what I said.
Don't lose your head.
Three in the bed,
And the little one said,
"If you wanna be wed, make up your mind!"
It's her or me, chum,
don't wanna be some girl in a threesome,
Are you blind?
OooOoo, don't be bitter.
OooOoo, 'Cause I'm fitter.
OooHoo, Why hasn't it hit her?
He doesn't wanna bang you, somebody hang you.
Uh oh.
Here we go!
Your comment went viral.
I didn't really mean it but rumours spiral.
Wow, Anne, way to make the country hate you.
Mate, what was I meant to do?
Sorry, not sorry bout', what I said,
I'm just tryna' have some fun.
Don't worry, don't worry,
Don't lose your head, I didn't mean to hurt anyone...
L-O-L, say "Oh well", or go to hell.
I'm sorry not sorry bout' what I said.
Don't lose your head.
Tried to elope, but the pope said nope,
Our only hope was Henry.
He got a promotion, caused a commotion, set in motion, the C of E.
The rules, were so outdated.
Us two wanted to get x rated.
Soon, excommunicated.
Everybody chill its totes god's will.
Henry's out every night on the town
Just sleepin' around,
Like what the hell?
If that's how it's gonna be,
Maybe I'll flirt with a guy or three just to make him jel.
Henry finds out and he goes mental,
He screams and shouts like so judgemental.
"You damned witch"
Mate, just shut up.
I wouldn't be such a bi--- if you could get it up.
Uh oh,
Here we go.
Is that what you said?
And now he's going 'round like,
"Off with her head!"
No!
Yea, I'm pretty sure he means it.
Seems it.
What was I meant to do?
What was she meant to do?
Like, what was I meant to do?
What was she meant to do?
No, but, what was I meant to do?!
Sorry, not sorry bout', what I said,
I'm just tryna' have some fun.
Don't worry, don't worry,
Don't lose your head, I didn't mean to hurt anyone...
L-O-L, say "Oh well", or go to hell.
~Just go to hell~
Sorry not sorry bout' what I said.
Sorry not sorry bout' what she said.
Sorry NOT sorry bout' what I said,
Don't lose your head.
All you wanna do
All you wanna do baby
I think we can all agree I'm a ten amongst these threes
All you wanna do
All you wanna do baby
And ever since I was a child I'd make the boys go wild
All you wanna do
All you wanna do baby
Take my first music teacher, Henry Mannox
I was young it's true but even then I knew
The only thing you wanna to do is...
'Cause all you wanna do
All you wanna do baby
Is touch me, love me, can't get enough, see
All you wanna do
All you wanna do baby
Is please me squeeze me birds and the bees me
Run your fingers through my hair
Tell me I'm the fairest of the fair
Playtime's over
The only thing you wanna do is..
But then there was another guy
Francis Dereham
Serious, stern and slow
Get's what he wants and he won't take no
Passion in all that he touches
The sexy secretary to the Dowager Duchess
Helped him in his office, had a duty to fulfil
He even let me use his favourite quill
spilled
Ink all over the parchment my wrist was so tired
Still I came back the next day as he required
You say I'm what you need
All you want you don't need to plead
'Cause I feel the chemistry
Like I get you and you get me
And I know this is it
He just cares so much this one's legit
We have a real connection
I'm sure this time is different
'Cause all you wanna do
All you wanna do baby
Is touch me love me can't get enough see
All you wanna do
All you wanna do baby
Is please me, squeeze me, birds and the bees me
You can't wait a second more
To get
My corset on the floor
Playtime's over
The only thing you wanna do is...
Tall, large, Henry the Eighth
Supreme head of the Church of England
Globally revered
Although you wouldn't know it from the look of that beard
Made me a lady in waiting
Hurled me and my family up in the world
Gave me duties in court and he swears it's true
That without me he doesn't know what he'd do
You say I'm what you need
All you want we both agree
This is the place for me
I'm finally where I'm meant to be
Then he starts saying all this stuff
He cares so much he calls me love
He says we have this connection
I guess it's not so different
'Cause all you wanna do
All you wanna do baby
Is touch me, love me, can't get enough see
All you wanna do
All you wanna do baby
Is seize me, squeeze me, birds and the bees me
There's no time for when or how 'cause you
Just got to have me now
Playtime's over
The only thing you wanna do is...
With Henry it isn't easy
His temper's short and his mates are sleazy
Except for this one courtier
He's a really nice guy, just so sincere
The royal life isn't what I planned
But Thomas is there to lend a helping hand
So sweet, makes sure that I'm okay
And we hang out loads when the king's away
This guy finally
Is what I want, the friend I need
Just mates, no chemistry
I get him and he gets me
And there's nothing more to it
He just cares so much he's devoted
He says we have a connection
I thought this time was different
Why did I think he'd be different?
But it's never, ever different
'Cause all you wanna do
All you wanna do baby
Is touch me, when will enough be enough?
See
All you wanna do
All you wanna do baby
Squeeze me, don't care if you don't please me
Bite my lip and pull my hair
As you tell me I'm the fairest of the fair
Playtime's over
Playtime's over
Playtime's over
The only thing
The only thing
The only thing you wanna do is...
