( EVEN EVEN EVILER ANGRY KILLER KITTEN NOISES )

Corey is gud bab

*nOdS VigOrOuSlY

*bakes even more while singing some Italian song*

*dresses her up in a bakers outfit and hands her some ingredients*

*he laughs as he puts cookies in the oven and joins in the fun*

*he chucks a huge bag of flour at the wall, exploding into a giant cloud*

*he takes a batch of cookies out of the oven, and sits down*

*he puts a cookie in her mouth, eating another one for himself*

*he bakes one big heart shaped sugar cookie decorated with various frostings and candies*

it's for you *he smiles*

*he leaves the cookie on the island and goes to make some cannoli*

*he gets a big comfy chair for her to sit in*

your very welcome *he sits on top of the island and eats a cannoli*

*he gives her a cannoli* taste it please

is it good?

*he grinned* thank you

my mother, she loved cooking so she taught me, cause she didn't want me to always eat junk food when i move out

yea, i don't see why everyone feels it's hard to cook, it almost the easiest and funnest thing you can do

oh, well its simple really *he gets some sausage links and fries them, makes some pancakes, and cuts the sausage links into bite size pieces to make a hash with them* it's kinda like baking but more free form, nothing has to be precise

oil cooking? what's that?

you shouldn't get fires, you only are supposed to use a little bit of oil, unless your frying something

you set stuff in the oven with cooking too

*he hugs her* yea i just wanna be an asshole

*he gives her a little rose and sits down on the island again*

yes?

I live on the edge

*he brandishes her gun he secretly snagged* indeed you could

you sure liked cannoli don't ya

*he plays with the gun a bit* I did, and?

*he hands her gun back and pulls out a gold plated revolver* "and i've had this beauty for about seven years"

*he points at the ground* "your literally standing on the hatch to my gun cellar"

*he lets her grab it*

yes indeed, it's the most expensive gun i own *he smiles*

*he nods*

why thank you *he puts the gun away and sits on the floor*

*he sits next to her, handing her another cannoli*

*he sighs* well i guess i'll have to eat the rest of these pastries all by myself

I'll just put them in the freezer *does so*

i shoot birds out the window, but other than that i usually go to the bar

well i have a bar right here in the kitchen but we could go the the bar i guess

*he rotated a piece of the wall reveling a bar like section of the kitchen* you wanna mix your own drink orrrrrrr?

*he sighs* what's your favorite drink

*he swiftly mixes a Shirley temple, and an old fashioned for himself*

*he glugs down his drink in one slurp*

of course I can *he mixes a white Russian* why else would i have a bar in my kitchen

i do not in fact have a **** ton of money, i just have a ton of money, very different *he chuckles*

*he sips on his drink* would you like a ton of money?

*he downed the rest of the drink* whaaaat if i lost all my money

*he paused* what if i died

what if i don't go to hell, what if i go into purgatory *he snickered*

whaaaaaaaat if i steal you from hell?

*he mixes a fruity drink* what if i made a perfect world just for the two of us that doesn't go by the rules taught to us by an old child molester in a church

*he takes a bottle whiskey and takes a swig* hey it was worth a try

nobody truly knows what happens after death, so it might be possible

*he took another sip and thinks* naw, there are too many assholes in this world, that would be the first to go

yea, that would be perfect wouldn't it *he puts the bottle away after taking a good glug out of it*

the people who are smart enough to run the world, so we don't have to either that or just make a Paradise just for us *belch*

*he laughed and downed the fruity drink*

*he belches again* I'm not?

*he opens a bottle of wine up and sips* um, y-yeaaa right over there by the living room...... *he grabs her hand to lead her to the bedroom but fails and trips over his own feet, face planting in the living room carpet*

*completely passed out he lays in the bed in deep sleep*

*he got up, and walked to the bar* hey, stop, y-y-you don't have to......no

i dont need ****ing medicine i ain't *hicc* a pussy *he goes back to lay down

(welp this was fun, can't think of a reply, i'll leave ya with this, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JOYcNNamp8Y )