i feel like my mind is slowly malfunctioning. i can't stay happy for more than an hour, nor can i stay sad. or angry. or calm. or crazy. or ａｎｙｔｈｉｎｇ. i'm not schizophrenic. i know this fair enough. i don't want to be. i feel bad for those who are, though. i'm fully aware that this may just be me hitting my teenager phase, for real now, or that's it is mood swings. but something still bugs me. really badly. i'm afraid. i've been so tired and out of everything for the past month. no amount of sleep has done me justice. i'm so damn tired, even now. i'm under-average health. that could be it. or i'm drinking too much caffeine. that could be it, too. but even then, when i drink things like juice and water, after a few days i still feel like shit. waking up at 5:00 AM every morning to get to school isn't making anything better, either. what do i do? who do i go to? where? why? when? how??

at maximum. i'm usually more energetic, preppy, etc etc, but ive been feeling like shit so much it's making me anxious.

hhh