dude, no, dont harm yourself, just dont. even if your life is ****ed up at all costs, you can still fix it. you still have an amazing future ahead, and who knows, maybe it will be the best part of your life. You have a lot of friends who care about you. you have us. even if you feel alone, theres always people near you that protect you, even if you dont see them. Its not worth taking away your life even if your enviroment around you is horrible. things will get better in tge future, i promise.