elden ring character 😳

well you seem like a small blonde little man that would be kidnapped by an eldritch being because your sister was being a dumbass

The eldritch being would be Bingus, and thine sister would be your father, Heron!11

(HEALLP I READ THAT AS HEROIN 💀💀💀💀💀💀)

Ah, yes. Thine gay, adopted father, Heroin.

His name, not unlike the heroin Lord Bingus is now offering to thee

Well, Lord Bingus offers to thee the heroin and sweets within his van, shouldst thou step within. Dost thou accept?

of course. he harbors all

Lord Bingus nods his head in satisfaction, and soon after starts the van moving again.

The chambers, mine chambers. Of the wint'ry night.

Indeed, t'is a thing to wonder about. But t'is hardly thine first visit.

T'was the place from which Bingus' militia gathered, to beckon his return.

Sugnib yet resides, but he is of no concern, currently.

WAIT UHH ****. That dog from popped the performer