I feel like I should start with saying I am not asking for forgiveness from anyone who isn't involved this isn't something for you to forgive me for. As for the ones involved whether you chose to forgive or not, it is only up to you. I also just want to say even after this is said, do not expect me to disappear trust me I won't I'll probably still be on, I might seem like I am trying to act like nothing happened but believe me I am really understanding I am horrible for what I have done and hope I can change and better myself.

starting with the main reason for this post I can't link the post but user @justmcytdrawings made a call out post on the things I have done during our friendship or something I don't know what it was, but I am here to explain or elaborate on it and apologize for how I treated them during it i admit i was a complete weirdo and i was obsessive and an asshole in my post before this (i think) i explained how there were things that happened that weren't originated from me that wouldn't have much importance here. But i want to say that during this i had no idea they were cutting themselves over the things i was doing (not an excuse for my actions) and they have never come to me themselves during this. If i had known i am pretty sure i would have apologized a lot more sooner

ok back more of direct apology I am sorry I did those things to you, I understand if you never want to forgive me for it but I just hope you know and get they I truly am sorry for being weird towards you as for the shit talking (also not an excuse but) I remember sometimes I would talk about another friend or something and you would seem ever off and I might have taken your emotions a little offly, so I would also get pretty upset and only mention how you would switch up I don't think you were the best of a friend either to be honest you never came to me when I had done something wrong and maybe you have tried recently but that doesn't change the fact that while it was happening you never tried to stop it. I also did not appreciate the fact that you could switch up so fast but now seeing what I had done i guess I can't really blame you for that

I'm trying to figure out more to say but my mind is going other places I just want to clarify that I have no current feelings for you neither romantic or hatred, none I accept the fact you felt ready or idk together enough to bring this out to everyone, I also admit I clearly had no clue it was this bad I don't think I was paying much attention to it, half of it I don't even remember. I hope for your safety and I hope you at least read and acknowledge that I know what I have done to wrong you. I hope we never have to talk again and I hope to god you would stop dragging on this situation after this post I won't be talking about you, this situation or anything so please don't take any of my posts that seem to be about something to be about this.

as for other people involved like the people I might have said some shitty things too I also deeply apologize for that, I am not the best at managing my anger or the way I go about it but because of that I cannot excuse my lash-outs and behavioral problems I hope I can try to better myself on that other than that I apologize.

pretty sure I lost my only friendships and relationship on here which is probably better that way I rather have none than half ones that don't see what I have done wrong a majority of this situation is my fault

why are you critiquing my apology I don't think thats what you should do

I don't think you have a say in what I do or don't do

it would have been better to come forward to me myself with something like that as it was happening but I understand that now and I am sorry for having put you through that and you're right I get it I was pretty shitty but you need to understand though I may have caused the most pain doesnt mean you didn't do some things to and I'm not trying to make it seem like you said you didn't when I say this either (I'm not trying to seem like I'm putting words in your mouth)