I… I got scolded. I’ve been getting scolded more recently than usual. I keep flubbing something within my responsibilities. I got in trouble for not locking the door while my dad was sleeping. Me failing this simple task that will keep us safe has been regular. Too regular for it to be ok. I sat in front of the door I failed to lock for about an hour. This wasn’t punishment from my mom or dad, I did it myself. And- while sitting there. I thought about it. I’ve been thinking about it. C*tting myself. I don’t actually want to do it. But Would it make me feel better? Would it make me feel like I’m punishing myself in the way I deserve? What would it be like to do it? But I don’t want to. I… I won’t do it. …