Dave: You have to apologize to Rupert Johnny: Fine. Johnny: 'Un**** you' or whatever.

*The squad is talking about what it'd be like to open up a homemade Pokemon gym* Dave, joking: Rupert's just sitting at the end, juggling- fushigi-ing 2 glass balls, in super tight pants, just waiting for their kid delivery once they best their minions. Rupert: Well they would be Pokeballs. And also it's not a kid delivery. There's no ****ing guarantee that a kid that comes into the beginning of my crucible makes it to the end of it undefeated. Rupert: In fact, I'm gonna stack this gym! With ****in pros! Rupert: It's- It's gonna be brutal. It's gonna be a torture gym. Johnny: Well- Well what's the theme? Are you like- is it a bug theme, or like- Rupert: YEAH, JOHNNY. UH- UH- UH- UH YEAH JOHNNY. IM GONNA OPEN UP A BUG TYPE POKEMON GYM. YOU IDIOT. Rupert: YEAH THAT'S WHAT I WANT, BECAUSE I WANNA GIVE- I WANNA SHIT OUT BADGES FOR EVERY HAM AND EGGER THAT COMES TO MY FRONT DOOR. Dave: *Cracking up* Rupert: YEAH, JOHNNY. 'Uhh, go Caterpie! >~>' That's me, you ****ING imbecile. 'Yeah go- uhhh- d-do your be

*st Kakuna"

Rupert: WHAT ARE YOU ****ING TALKING ABOU- Yeah a ~bug type~ gym. Johnny: Dave: Okaaay- Johnny: Alright, um, I'm gonna go. I've embarrassed myself... Dave: Maybe fire? Fire type? Johnny: Yeah fire-based? Like- have fires?Rupert: Yeah, yeah I'll probably just- That's a good idea Dave I'll probably just do a fire type one... SO THAT ONE KID WITH ONE BLASTOISE CAN **** UP MY WHOLE SHOP. Rupert: KILLED ALL OF US WITH ONE BLASTOISE, HUH? WOW. SHIT I SHOULD'VE- Johnny: Just do rock, then! Just do rock type! Rupert, voice dripping with contempt: The same Blastoise...

Dave: Sometimes I drink milk straight out of the container. Rupert: The cow??? Dave: What? Johnny: Rupert, W H Y?

Dave: I told Rupert their ears flush when they lie. Johnny: Why? Dave: Look. Dave: Hey Rupert! Do you love us? Rupert, covering their ears: No. Johnny:

Dave: I know you snuck out last night, Rupert. Johnny: Play dumb! Rupert: Who's Rupert? Johnny: NOT THAT DUMB!!!

Dave: Rupert, what do IDK, LY, and TTYL mean? Rupert: I don’t know, love you, talk to you later Dave: Ok, I love you too, I’ll just ask Johnny.

Dave: In your opinion, what’s the height of stupidity? Rupert: *turning to Johnny* How tall are you?

Dave: I’m kind of crushing on someone, but I’m worried about telling you who it is, because you’re not going to like it Johnny: Just rip the bandage off. Dave: It’s Rupert. Johnny: Put the bandage back on.

Dave: Who thinks I can fit 15 marshmallows in my mouth? Rupert: You’re a hazard to society Johnny: And a coward. DO TWENTY.

*The squad is having dinner together* Dave: Rupert, can you pass the salt? Rupert: *Throws Johnny across the table*

Dave: Rupert and I don’t use pet names. Johnny: I see. Hey, what do bees make? Dave: Honey? Rupert: Yes, dear? Dave: Johnny: Don't ever lie to my face again.

Dave: Come on, I wasn’t that drunk last night. Johnny: You were flirting with Rupert. Dave: So what? They're my partner. Johnny: You asked them if they were single. Dave: Johnny: And then you cried when they said they weren't.

Dave, holding a python: Guys I impulsively bought a snake, what do I name him Rupert: You did WHAT– Johnny: William Snakepeare

Lol

LOL

Same