I have like no friends, ****, the only friends I have are really cool people that my mom won't let me hang out with because they're boys. I wish she trusted them and me, but I probably can't even call them friends anymore because I doubt they want to deal with my bullshit. The worst part is I hate being dishonest and sneaking out to meet them, or just even texting (she checks my chats and blocks Discord). I'm so goddamn lonely I let myself get ****en groomed, and now I have a situationship with some ****ass guy in his 30s (I'm 15)

I've also been grounded for a month, and haven't had a hangout with people I like in months. This is also the reason I'm back on flipanim

I know this isn't forever, but I genuinely love my mom, and I don't want to disappoint her like she's done so much for me, all for me to just throw it away

The girls at my school are SO unrelatable its actually so hard to get along with them cuz they think I'm the weird, quiet kid. I just never know what to say, and the things I do want to say, they won't get. I'm not even a pick me, I genuinely love all girls my age its just I'm a fat ****en chud

Did I mention the grooming? YEAH, WTF, and I can't tell anyone because I like this guy SO MUCH, but like hell no, none of this would happen if I wasn't so goddamn lonely. He's never done anything to me, so if I tell anyone, the only thing that'll happen is him getting fired and me in trouble and I just can't deal with all of that

And I'm trying all the self-help stuff like therapy, but it's kinda ass because my mom's paying for it, so the therapist is allowed to tell my mom whatever

And I know this all makes my mom out to be some kind of monster, but she really is trying her best as a single mom, setting her daughter up for success. I just need to lock tf in

Sorry to anyone reading this, I just needed to vent because there litterly no where else I can

I feel so helpless hes the only one who actually wants to be my friend