Woke up to a nightmare

Its not like I've never felt like I was being watched but this nightmare made it hard to stay in my room. Everyone I cared about was getting hurt, or killed from this one person. I have a couple Assumptions on what it Symbolized, but it got narrowed down at the end. When they kept on multiplying. And I had to save myself cause everyone I cared about was gone. I never woke up with terible sweat like I did with this one. But I had to leave my room and play on my phone

Grapefruit-S0DA[OP]

19.08.2021 11:21

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Mind i say in this nightmare i didnt have my own voice. I couldn't speak. But somehow I got wings but I couldn't fly high enough to fly away. Maybe I wanted revenge on the one who hurt everyone I loved in the night mare. Honestly this is all more my side of the story of something. I think it was of an old friend, someone I thought I could never leave. I made a promise to them a long time ago that I wouldn't leave, but I ended up having to. In this relationship I couldn't speak much, and if I did id get yelled at for what I was trying to talk about or clear up. I've tried leaving before, but all the attempts of leaving ended up in them saying they would kill themselves (probably not bc of me leaving but other things. But it was always weird it was always when I was trying to leave) Having them as a friend also made it hard to talk to people. Yes I understand I still have a big mouth. But I always feared saying the worst. Or them doing it for me. This relationship gave me a ton of trust issues,

Grapefruit-S0DA[OP]

19.08.2021 11:26

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For reasons I couldn't speak. They would sometimes also laugh at things I was proud of, or one thing that stuck is they made me hate not only myself but my body. My self confidence was no where when I was with them. They would tell me to do stuff they never followed them selves. Don't get me wrong tho, I was jealous of this person. They were able to get help, to find friends and all that. But I was so scared id mess up or something. Of course I wouldn't be to nice to someone who made me want to end it a couple of times. But unlike them I wouldn't really run off to other people. I didnt really think I had anyone to do so. Which was soffacsting, but oh well. I was able to think alot of things thru eith them. I was always exsposed to be in my head with them so thats not to shocking.

Grapefruit-S0DA[OP]

19.08.2021 11:29

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Also dont mind me writing out my mind. Ill forget of things in do time if I dont