its bad but at least no vegetal

[Meet the Heavy Title Card] [The Heavy walks up to the camera and places Minigun on a cardboard box and sits down in a chair.] Heavy: "I am Heavy Weapons Guy... and this [grabs Minigun] is my weapon. [lays both hands covetously on Minigun] She weighs one hundred fifty kilograms and fires two hundred dollar, custom-tooled cartridges at ten thousand rounds per minute. [looks intently at viewer] It costs four hundred thousand dollars to fire this weapon...for twelve seconds." Heavy: [Laughs] Heavy: [Checks the barrel of his Minigun] "Oh my God, who touched Sascha? Alright...Who touched my gun!?" Heavy: "Some people think they can outsmart me. Maybe, [sniff] maybe. I've yet to meet one that can outsmart bullet." Heavy: [Holds up cartridge to the camera as sound of Minigun revving up is heard] [Heavy devastates the enemies with his Minigun on Dustbowl Stage 1 Cap 1.] [Team Fortress 2 theme plays.] Heavy: "Waaaaahhhhh! Uwaaaaaaah! Ahahahahaha! Cry some more!" [Pause] Heavy: "Heheh, cr