I might come back to this post btw cause theres alot I didnt say but I'm just trying to Express what my minds on rn

And finely maybe not being scared of the thoughts in my mind

I worked my ass off. Not cause I wanted to graduate. But cause my dad finally came back to are family and I wanted to make not only him but my mother proud. It's all I've wanted. They were happy but- idk... I'm 19 now. I lost my partner I've had now to cancer. I have no job, no I'd, no money. And I'm still living with my parents. I know I can do so much more but my brothers constantly push me down so ****ing much. I'm trying to get my I'd but have no money to get the stuff to get it rn. I've been trying my damndest not to snap... not to end it all.. I wish I was in the place he showed me..and told me about so long ago. I place that I can feel free to be myself. To be happy. With someone I love... why cant I have this ... ahhhhhh.... I'm getting my i.d soon Trying to anyways. Then in getting a job. And then saving up so I can leave this family. I'm separating every contact I have with them besides my mother. I'm going to start my life over. Find someone to love and for them to love me. See the world.

In the end I did 17 or so classes all in 2 months

Before graduating. I was about to fail all fo school. I was so shitty and the school didnt helpe me threw it so much I had so many classes I needed done.