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01.01.2022
115 comments
03.01.2022 04:16
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are you awake
03.01.2022 04:16
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i really miss you
03.01.2022 04:18
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things are getting pretty bad again haha
03.01.2022 04:18
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someone said some pretty mean things to me a few days ago and it really stuck with me
03.01.2022 04:18
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but i think you can guess who it was
03.01.2022 04:19
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i love you
03.01.2022 04:19
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i hope you’re okay :)
03.01.2022 05:19
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HEY
03.01.2022 05:20
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IM SO SORRY I DIDNT SEE THIS
03.01.2022 05:21
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im okayyyy but are you? are you hydrated? are you eating? and how bad was it?
03.01.2022 05:23
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it’s okay i’m glad you’re okay. i haven’t been eating much and it was pretty bad it really really kinda just yknow put me back to square one. like i made so much progress with my mental health then boom he kinda ruined it
03.01.2022 05:23
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wha td he say?
03.01.2022 05:24
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also go eat >:(
03.01.2022 05:25
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just a lot that i never tried and that i’m still not trying that the reason why everyone leaves me is my fault then he ****ing said “why is your old best friend now mine?”
03.01.2022 05:25
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ass hole
03.01.2022 05:25
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wait who? who was he talking about?
03.01.2022 05:25
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like thanks. i have been trying i try very ****ing hard
03.01.2022 05:25
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mk
03.01.2022 05:25
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they kinda just left me for alice lmao
03.01.2022 05:26
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i don’t know why
03.01.2022 05:26
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i know you do. even i can see that.
03.01.2022 05:26
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i tried pretty hard to please them but i guess i’m just not worth it
03.01.2022 05:26
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but that was an ass move of alice.
03.01.2022 05:26
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NO
03.01.2022 05:27
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i just don’t know what to do anymore like genuinely maybe he’s right? like i am the reason everyone leaves me almost everyone i talk to only talks to me when it’s about their problems
03.01.2022 05:28
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you ARE worth it. otherwise i wouldnt have stuck around. do you realize how mich i risk just to talk to you? im literally risking my home and family just to talk to you, but i still do, because i love you.
03.01.2022 05:28
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and you ARE worth it.
03.01.2022 05:29
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i know you do but i don’t know before all that he said he was in love with me i don’t understand why how can you say that after everything ? he asked if we could be friends and i said no then he got defensive and shit i don’t even understand what love is i never did and i still don’t
03.01.2022 05:30
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one of the main reasons i started dating alice was just to feel love and finally figure out what it felt like
03.01.2022 05:30
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but i didn’t get that
03.01.2022 05:30
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he just confused me more
03.01.2022 05:31
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love is... love is hard. i feel the exact same way. all i know is that i love you abd thats all i need to get thrpugh the day.
03.01.2022 05:32
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that makes me happy thank you i just wish i could have finally got what i was looking for you know ?
03.01.2022 05:33
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yeah. i get it. you just fell for the wrong person. therell be more people to love. he just doesnt deserve it at this point.
03.01.2022 05:34
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and if it means anything, if i could be on disc id be with you all the way, you hear?
03.01.2022 05:34
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maybe i’m just unloveable
03.01.2022 05:35
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i beg to differ your honor
03.01.2022 05:35
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i love you
03.01.2022 05:36
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but there’s people better than me
03.01.2022 05:37
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that’s why mk chose alice over me
03.01.2022 05:37
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ive loved you ever since we became friends and i dont plan on stopping any time soon
03.01.2022 05:38
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no, there isnt. alice probably has some sort of blackmail or something over mk, knowing alice.
03.01.2022 05:39
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after i blocked alice mk texted me right after asking how my day was and if i had a good christmas i hate it i can’t tell if they still like me or if they feel bad
03.01.2022 05:39
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or maybe they’re just talking to me so they can make fun of me with alice
03.01.2022 05:40
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i hate being made fun of
03.01.2022 05:40
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here i have an idea that might make you feel better. ill just talk about some times where i felt close to you, or good memories i have about you. and then we can look at them again together okay?
03.01.2022 05:41
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okay maybe i’ll feel better after that
03.01.2022 05:41
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i’m sorry for troubling you again
03.01.2022 05:41
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please don’t be mad at me
03.01.2022 05:44
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you arent bothering me the first real memory i have of talking to you was in sixth grade. we were in the library for some bullshit presentation thing i think. and i think it wads mee you and christian kinda sitting together. and christian, being the rat he is, made the worst joke ive ever heard about a yeast infection and a corndog stick. you stared straight DAGGERS into him. and then you laughed. i wasnt sure whether to laugh or be scared honestly
03.01.2022 05:45
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i don’t remember that but i don’t remember much anyways
03.01.2022 05:49
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another earlier memory i have of you was i believe early seventh grade although maybe late sixth? anyways it was those shitty fùcking passion projects in aig. i did some shit about american intellegence or whatever. i dont remember anyone elses, but yours actually caught my attention. it was about different kinds of art. the most memorable part was a slide about street art. i remember asking if that was graffiti, and you clarifying that it wasnt. the way you carried yourself that day, kind of like a smart and edgy but socially awkward, that was the day i started kind of considering you a friend, even tho we didnt talk much.
03.01.2022 05:52
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haha i wish i could still do that i had to do a presentation in civics and i was shaking pretty bad it was good because i was partners with a girl who doesn’t have problems talking also i do remember that a little bit
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03.01.2022 05:52
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yeah that was really cool
03.01.2022 05:53
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that does sound cool
03.01.2022 05:54
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and then there was the first time we actually talked it was april 2020 i believe, like right in the peak of covid and i emailed you asking about some furry shit (i think it was about your former fursona or something) and you responded with "what are you a furry now or something" and from there spun out the best friend ive ever had
03.01.2022 05:54
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hey when are you gonna get your phone back
03.01.2022 05:55
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AAH I REMEMBER THAT I HATE REMEMBERING MY YOUNGER SELF
03.01.2022 05:56
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i dont know i dont even know if im getting it back
03.01.2022 05:56
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YOU HATE IT? I WAS THE FUCCIN FURRY
03.01.2022 05:57
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yeah…… i really want to look at you
03.01.2022 05:57
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that sounds weird
03.01.2022 05:58
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i want to see you
03.01.2022 05:58
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like in person
03.01.2022 05:58
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again
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03.01.2022 05:58
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i want to see you too
03.01.2022 05:59
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once i escape from the hell that is home i will i promise
03.01.2022 05:59
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okay :)
03.01.2022 05:59
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AAH ITS 1
03.01.2022 06:00
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eh who cares i do t have school tomorrow
03.01.2022 06:00
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wait do you
03.01.2022 06:00
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YES I DO
03.01.2022 06:01
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WHY DO I HAVE TO GO AND YOU DONT
03.01.2022 06:01
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BECAUSE WEST SUCKS ASS
03.01.2022 06:02
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ALSO WE START TWO WEEKS EARLY AT THE START OF THE YEAR
03.01.2022 06:03
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ARE YOU GONNA GO SLEEP?
03.01.2022 06:04
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did i ever tel you i have scars on my back from binding too much
03.01.2022 06:04
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no not yet
03.01.2022 06:04
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oh no does it hurt?
03.01.2022 06:06
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NO IT DOESNT i just remembered they feel weird
03.01.2022 06:07
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oh as long as youre okay
03.01.2022 06:07
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thats why i dont tuck lmao
03.01.2022 06:08
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LMAO
03.01.2022 06:08
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bottom surgery 😋👍
03.01.2022 06:08
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that and its easier to hide than yknow chest thingies
03.01.2022 06:10
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boobies 🤤
03.01.2022 06:11
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yeah those
03.01.2022 06:12
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im too gay for those today
03.01.2022 06:13
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i never really like them because they look weird
03.01.2022 06:13
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yeah like theyre just fat chests i dont get it
03.01.2022 06:15
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then again i spend my spare time catching pedos on the internet my judgement might be a little wack
03.01.2022 06:16
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INKNOW LIKE PEOPLE WHO R LIKE ooh i love boobs they’re so sexzyyy they’re just fat ?? 🤨
03.01.2022 06:17
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EXACTLY you might be the only dude ive ever hear say that
03.01.2022 06:18
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because i’m not a boy 😨
03.01.2022 06:19
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WAIT SORRY im so sorry
03.01.2022 06:19
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LMAO ITS FINE
03.01.2022 06:20
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the only ENBY right
03.01.2022 06:21
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shore 😁
03.01.2022 06:21
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okay
03.01.2022 06:22
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OH ALSO im starting to think that uh nebula > venus if you feel
03.01.2022 06:22
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OKAY HOLD KN
03.01.2022 06:23
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i changed the spotify playlist name 💪💪💪💪🏳️‍⚧️
03.01.2022 06:23
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TYYYY
03.01.2022 06:23
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thanks for telling me :)
03.01.2022 06:24
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yeah np!
03.01.2022 06:25
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i dyed my hair black
03.01.2022 06:25
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i miss my red tips <//3
03.01.2022 06:25
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but that hair style is also linked to a bad point in my life
03.01.2022 06:26
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well if its what you think is right, im proud of you!
03.01.2022 06:28
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i wanted to bleach the underside of my hair like a whitish colour but i’m scared
03.01.2022 06:30
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of what?
03.01.2022 06:31
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MY HAIR FALLING OUT AAH I WOULD BE SO UGLY
03.01.2022 06:34
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OHHH TOUCHE
03.01.2022 06:35
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i’m already rapidly losing hair because i rip it out all the time i don’t want bleach to ruin it more
03.01.2022 06:38
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thats a good point
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