I am eternally worried that everything i make is fake deep and i will never make anything that is worth seeing or considering by anyone else. I dont wanna make popcorn fiction or silly art i want to make things that are worth thinking about but im always worried im doing it wrong bc i truly have never gotten feedback that someone has *put thought* into what im writing. Its all just consume consume consume wait for something more to consume not think never think just consume and i never want my writing to be like that i dont want to be a creator that facilitates that i want to make people think but im so worried i dont do that and i get so wrapped up in the culture that i forget my art morals. I dont want to end up like JK rowling which means i dont wanna be a terf but its obvious she doesnt want what she has with harry potter. Its successful but its solely a medium for consumption not for thought or themes it is a child's book and she seems to want more than that

Its just that its never "neat symbolism" or "there are some interesting themes here" its "pretty colors" and "that looks nice" I dont care how it looks anymore. The stuff im happiest making is the stuff with the most theming behind it that no one has ever noticed