Comment shit below
11 comments
ACupOfJosh
20.10.2018 19:41
LinkHow many shrimps do you have to eat before you make your skin turn pink. Eat too much and you'll get sick. Shrimps are pretty rich. Doo doo dodododo doo do
I took a shit in a Denny’s urinal about a week ago. A man ran in during my act and screamed “who ur top 5 rapper.” Nostrils flaring, I looked into his eyes and didn’t say a word. 12 seconds pass and he jots down something on his napkin and attempts to hand it to me. But since both of my hands were gripped firmly on each of my cheeks for easier flow, he places it in my mouth whilst repeating “S M H.” Muttering his phrase, he quickly turns around, points in the mirror, and stands still. I reluctantly finish my weekly ritual and take a gander at his message. It was the password for level 21 of Zombies Ate My Neighbors. I sprint out of the bathroom - pants down to ankles and all - and head into traffic. Old ****er on a moped nails me and the napkin gracefully falls into a puddle. Password gone. I take my shirt off and start strangling myself in the middle of the highway. Old dude changes his Spotify from Canibus to Ligeti, turns it to 11, and drives the **** off.
As I’m coping with losing my last sense of achievement in the middle of route 20, I hear a muffled three syllable phrase beneath me. It was that clown ass nigga from the bathroom. He crawls his way from the sink hole next to me, and asks “Why was Barbara Walters never in Vietnam?” In that very moment, it felt like time stood still. I re-examined every decision I’ve ever made in the matter of seconds. Shirt: back on. Pants: back on. Password: so what. The cacophony of car horns comes to a pause, and everyone gets out of their car to clap and cheer. I slowly walk away with teary cheeks and a victorious smile. I make my way back into Denny’s, turn to the crowd, and throw a ****ing grenade at that trick nigga in the sinkhole.
